My Choice is Made...

Terms and Rules of Commitment

Prelude: In this list, at times I may seem too "angry”. Well, you can't say a single thing about me being a bitch, because YOU did this to me. You made me this. Don't like it? Shouldn't have cheated. Deal with it.

Rules:.

You MUST tell your parents.

Never drink. Ever. If you have no self-control while sober, I can imagine you screwing every girl that opens her legs.

Get more guy friends.

You will never see that girl again. NEVER speak to her again. Never even look at that home-wrecking slut again. Ever.

You cannot say ANYTHING about my guyfriends. Be that jealous type all you want. But, you're also the cheating type. At least I actually have someone out there I DO need to be jealous of. You bring up how I hang out with Greg or Geoff too much; I'll bring up how you're a cheating scumbag. Catch my drift?

As a rule, all friends must learn of my existence within 2-3 days of meeting their acquaintance. With pretty girls, that becomes 2-3 minutes.

You will restrict your time with your girlfriends. I DO NOT care that you "like girls better", I care that I have a small grain of respect for our relationship.

You lie to me ONCE, about anything, and you are GONE. How am I to know you aren't lying about other things? I do not trust you.

In the FAR, FAR future, all sexual encounters must be with a condom. And you will get tested.

I have the right to drop the relationship at any given time. If I get ANY inkling you even looked a girl funny, you are gone. No excuses.

Terms:

I would not be able to say "I love you" for a very, very long time. You lost that affection when you threw my heart out a window.

That also means no sex. Hell, for all I know you got a STD from this chick. You lost my trust in anything, and my affections are NOT something I freely give away (unlike some home-wrecking sluts...)

I do NOT like Nora. AT ALL. Remember that. Nor will I ever like this girl. I will punch her just as hard as I wanted to punch you that first day. I abhor their presence in your life.

All of my friends hate you, as well as my family. You may say you "only care about my opinion." Well, I care about theirs. You better kiss the ground they walk on, or a few of them will go through with their threat of beating you to a pulp.

Don't you DARE say you were "thinking of me the whole time" You sound like even more of a douchebag. If you had been thinking of me, you wouldn't have boned that girl. You forgot about me, or at least made a strong attempt to. I know that. I will never forget that.

I will not trust you, I do not trust you, and I may never trust you ever again. Trust is like glass. You drop it once; it shatters into a billion pieces. You can pick up the pieces and try and glue them back together, but it’ll never look or feel the way it did.

I will no longer feel any guilt when a guy tries to flirt with me. At least I can control myself around them.

Every moment of everyday you will have to prove to me that I did not make a stupid mistake staying with you. One wrong move by you and I am gone. Forever. No chance of parole.

General Commentary:

I amend my past statements about our engagement. If you were to ask me right now, you would very quickly get a NO. I refuse to shackle myself to a person who cannot even try to stay committed to a girl he JUST saw days before.

I cannot stress enough how much pain and heartache you caused me. You will never understand how many time I broke down in tears, or how in between those moments I FELT NOTHING AT ALL. How many times I tried to find a way to get rid of this pain, but never could. My innocence is gone, and it's your fault. I hope that this weighs on your conscious forever.

My self-worth and esteem was solely based on you. You made me feel beautiful, smart and funny. Now I feel the EXACT opposite. You might not be able to fix this, but you damn well better try.

You love me? Prove it. Because as soon as you put your dick into that home-wrecking bitch, you told me otherwise.

Our relationship is, in a way, back at square one. All affections must be worked up to, and you still have to try. I do not want to be taken for granted after making such a hard decision. You will earn my forgiveness.

Our relationship will NEVER be the same. No matter what. You should have said no.

People tell me I can find someone else "so much better". Your job? Prove them wrong.

What I agree to:

I agree that what we had was something to work for and keep. You cheated, yes, but part of me still lies in you. Yes, I can walk away at any time, and I won’t feel any regrets because I have VERY VERY good reasons to leave. But I am not done with you quite yet. There is hope we can move on from this, and I hope we can, but the ball is in your court. Do it again, you’re gone. Don’t do it again? Someday we might be able to live out those plans we made that Sunday night over fall break… remember those? Because I know I do.

Maybe this seems so official, maybe it’s scary, and seems difficult. But if you’re willing to put in 20000%, then I can too. If not, then tell me now before we go any further. There's a light at the end of this tunnel, and one day, we'll reach it.